– Daddy, let’s stay at home. I don’t feel like going to the zoo
- G-o-o-a-l! Be quiet! We’re going to…!
Children say that often when there is a difficult situation at home parents are not asking what the child wants and how she/he feels. Children often experience that parents are not prepared to listen, they don’t take responsibility: just say it will be ok or direct it to someone else, another adult.
Children mentioned that they wanted their parents to have emotions and to show they care to be able to manage these rather than the children feeling responsible for their parent.
Some children felt it is helpful for parents to be able to hold them and their needs in mind. Children want adults to take appropriate responsibility and not to involve them in conflicts. Sometimes parent need help to be able to help their children and need to be able to recognize this. They want to see that parents are able to seek and find help for themselves and for their children.
Children tell us that they often feel they have to wear ‘masks’ so that they appear to be happy/coping to their parents and to the outside world.
(1) Mom: don’t stick your nose here, these are adult things.
Dad: Maria, go to your room!
Child: as usual!
(2) Mom: let’s enrol her in a math course.
Dad: honey, let’s enrol her in a language course.
Child: hey, i want an arts course!
